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WHITEHOUSE.ORG

Billionaires for Bush
Landover Baptist
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Vision: The United States Dept. of Faith: Yesterday's Theocracy Today
Vision: Book Burning - Embracing a Proud True Christian® Tradition
The Presidential Prayer Team: Spiritual Warriors, Slayers of Liberalism
Vision: Defending American Marriage Against the Satanic Faggot Menace
FLAUNT YOUR FAITH:
Faith-Based Living

On January 20, 2001, President George W. Bush signed an executive order establishing the United States Department of Faith (USDOF). The USDOF's mission is to infuse traditional Christian values into American politics and thereby keep in check "compassion," which, when left unmonitored, destabilizes the delicate balance envisioned by Mr. Bush's call for "compassionate conservatism." The USDOF has been entrusted with overseeing disbursement of millions of taxpayer dollars to religious charities. In determining which organizations shall receive this Treasury money, the USDOF does not discriminate against any particular religion, making funds available to both Baptist churches and other churches or organizations that recognize Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior.

The USDOF is headed by Mr. Bush's and God's favorite church, Landover Baptist Church, the largest, most powerful assembly of worthwhile people ever to exist. An elite team of Bible-believing pastors and tenured professors of Creation Science at Landover Baptist University for the Saved have formed a True Christian® think-tank that, working with a Republican-majority Supreme Court, has guaranteed that it will – by any means necessary – bring every citizen of the United States of America back under the Lordship of Jesus Christ.

The USDOF's approach to this mission seamlessly dovetails with other initiatives in this Republican administration by providing assistance based not on need, but, quite the reverse, on preexisting wealth. The richer the charity, the more federal dollars they can expect to receive. As such, the USDOF will be using the taxpayers' tithes to the IRS to promote a national program of Trickle Down Salvation, whereby the blood of the Lord Jesus is washed over the wealthiest 10 percent of the country, eventually making its way down to even the lowest, most worthless trash.


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